Losing my way

Zoe and I took our usual Sunday morning walk today. The Sunday morning routine is to make a pot of coffee, load up my talking book reader and head out for our walk. It was about 6:00 Am: prime time for a morning walk.

 

Unfortunately 6:00 AM is much darker this time of year and my vision continues to get progressively worse. I found myself having trouble negotiating our route and giving my book the attention it deserved. I also wasn’t very present to Zoe. I ended up not enjoying my walk very much at all. As I reflect on my experience this morning I find myself knowing I need to do something different if I am going to continue to enjoy the morning ritual Zoe and I have come to look forward to each day.

 

I realize I am making the experience too complicated and at the same time trying to be too controlling. I created a set of reinforcing loops that lead from bad to worse.

 

Given the amount of vision I have it may not be feasible for me to both navigate the walk by sight and read a book at the same time. I realize now I walked slower to compensate for my inability to keep track of my surroundings. This resulted in Zoe feeling she had time to explore all the interesting things a dog can find along the way. I found myself having to struggle to get Zoe back on track, which got me more off track.

 

The fact is there is nothing bad about just enjoying the sounds of the morning and leaving it at that. I think I have a plan for next weekend.

 

____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

The challenge of the non-negotiable

I did a couple loads of laundry this morning. laundry is one of the less glamorous percs of having a home office. As I was starting the second load the felt dot I use as a guide to set the washer came loose and fell off the control dial. I can't see the lines on the controls of the washer so I must have a tactile means of setting the machine. No tactile feedback, no way to set the machine. To paraphrase and old, bad, joke: No touchy, no laundry.

 

The solution to this problem is very simple. I just need a sighted person who can put another felt dot on the washer control dial and everything will be fine for another few years. If I can't get this assistance I simply cannot use the washing machine. I don't say this to be demanding just a statement of fact.

 

It occurred to me this is a great example of the challenges disabled persons face in many settings each day. Part of the problem is the simplicity of the solution. I have a very supportive family but it simply isn't a high priority to anyone (including myself) to put a dot on a washing machine.

 

There is a fair chance I won't get the dot on the washer control until the towels and sheets are dirty and no one else feels like doing them. That's fine in a home setting but may easily reflect badly on everyone (but more likely the disabled employee) in a work setting.

 

This simple situation is an example of how a person with a disability can be perceived as being less capable of getting a job done. There's no real blame to be placed here just a non-negotiable need for a cooperative effort.

 

____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

 

Stripping it down in Nature

I attended a retreat yesterday called "Meeting God in the Rawness of Nature" with Richard Rohr, OFM. The day was held in Lakewood Forest Preserve, Wauconda, IL.  As with any good retreat experience it has taken a little time for the revelations of the day to clarify in my mind.

 

One of the reflection opportunities was to find a quiet place in the nature preserve and to reflect on the connection we have to what we found.  While I don't like to let my blindness be a controlling factor in my choices, I decided to keep things simple and not go too deep into the forest. I found ample opportunity to reflect at the place I was drawn to.

 

After settling myself I stood and absorbed the various textures, sounds, and smells of my surroundings. The reflection instructions asked us to identify a single object to reflect on but nothing called out to me. Instead I found myself reflecting on how the textures, sounds and smells of the nature preserve appeared to be a single monolith of input. As I paid closer attention I was drawn to the fact each element of this environment was a seemingly insignificant part of the whole. Instead of embracing the message of Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 I found myself thinking quite the opposite.

 

I saw the sense of order we often prescribe to our natural environment is just a way to simply put order to a very complex system. I had to question my assumption everything has a 'purpose" in nature. By making this assumption I can infer I must have a purpose in the universe. I realized I could not assume everything has a purpose nor could I infer I have a purpose in the universe. Instead I realized each plant, bird and insect was simply doing what they do.

 

This revelation left me struggling to see where my place in the universe resides. It would be comforting to know there was a plan for me and I am merely a passenger on a ride designed by someone else. While the passenger idea has a lot of merit I've never really embraced the idea.

 

My reflection drew me to the conclusion I am an active participant in the mystery of the universe. A much harder, but far more exciting, view of the world. While this revelation is not new or novel, it reinforces my beliefs and experience. I am regularly amazed at the gifts in my life. I am also regularly surprised at how easily the gifts in my life compliment or are supplemented by the environment I'm a part of.

 

I found myself left with a need to regularly reflect on my own gifts and how I can be gift to others. While this revelation is not significant it is also not something I purposefully do on a regular basis.

 

____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

She kissed a girl

One of the nice things about Facebook is the opportunity to keep up to date with the people I've gotten to know over the years but don't have frequent contact with. Jean is one of those people. We served on a Board together for a number of years. Our paths cross occasionally but infrequently. I enjoy reading her FB updates and I send her a copy of the newsletter I write.

 

The other day Jean posted a link to a disturbing story about the Atlanta police harassing a group of bar patrons for no other reason than they happened to be gay. I'm happy Jean posted the link because we all need to be vigilant when it comes to civil/human rights abuses.

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mike-alvear/stonewall-2009-police-rai_b_286649.html

 

Jean has posted a number of links related to issues facing gay people. Some have been serious, some funny and some I've ignored. Out of curiosity I took a look at Jean's profile. Jean is in a relationship and she's gay. The world is now different and I'm not sure how to deal with this new information.

 

acknowledge or ignore: that is the question. To acknowledge Jean 's sexuality is filled with all sorts of presumptuous pitfalls. I don't want to seem  like I'm showing some sort of approval: indicating approval for someone's sexuality is kind of like indicating approval of someone's racial background: "Hey I just realized you're Asian and I want you to know I'm OK with that". Showing some sort of solidarity seems like a noble thing to do but I can't imagine being part of one of the very few groups who are openly (and legally) discriminated against so that would be a hollow gesture. Pointing out the dangers of living together out of wedlock might be useful if it weren't for the institutionalized discrimination thing.

 

I guess I'm stuck. I'll shoot Jean a copy of this blog post and hope she continues to share tidbits from her life in whatever ways our paths cross.

____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

The Insurance Industry fears free-market capitalism

Susan Pisano of the America’s Health Insurance Plans (AHIP) trade group stresses two major points about health insurance plans:

 

1. The health insurance industry does not believe they could compete with a government operated insurance plan.

2. Only one percent of health care premiums go toward profits.

 

Two generally accepted points regarding health insurance administrative costs are:

 

1. For-profit health insurance have administrative costs of 15 - 30%.

2. Medicare has administrative costs under 5%.

 

When we put the position of AHIP together with what is accepted about administrative costs it is hard to see AHIP's concern over the competition a government administrated plan would provide. True, for-profit insurance plans would have to bring their administrative costs under control but that is not necessarily a bad thing. Once AHIP members brought their administrative costs under control the one percent difference (profits) would be insignificant and a free market would determine if they were deserved.

 

AHIP appears to fear free-market capitalism more than anything else.

 

____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros are all that

In going through my e-mail yesterday morning I found a very welcome surprise. The group "Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros" was going to be in town for a show tonight. They would be appearing at Club Garibaldi, a small venue, for the nominal cost of $10 per ticket. This seemed like a chance that might never come again. My plan to see the show came together better-than-expected. Unfortunately, the show itself turned out to be quite a disappointment.

 

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros is a Los Angeles-based band led by Alex Ebert. the group plays a mix of folk, world music and acoustic music, delivered with an enthusiasm reminiscent of a tent show revival.

 

I've been following Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros through various Internet radio stations across the country.  I've heard them live in concert a number of times over the Internet.  I had put them on my (very short) list of groups to see regardless of the ticket price.  This opportunity appeared to be too good to be true and in unexpected ways it was.

 

Jeremiah Nelson (of Madison, Wisconsin) opened the night with a set of original songs.  Nelson was accompanied by a violin player and they put on a good set. A number of times Nelson noted they would do a couple more songs and then   Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros would be out. After the second time nelson said this I began to wonder if they weren't getting the stretch signal from off-stage.

 

When Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros finally did come out it was clear this was not going to be their best performance.  It became all too obvious Alex Ebert, the group's leader was performing while impaired.  My wife told me later all of the band members and the sound person were drinking quite heavily throughout the performance. 

 

By the end of the night my initial concern this opportunity to see Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros might be a one-time thing was confirmed. I had assumed the group was on a path which might leave "small markets" such as Milwaukee behind.  I never imagined the group might implode in a fog of substance abuse.

 

 

Some links to the music:

 

http://www.myspace.com/jeremiahnelsonmusic

 

 

<http://www.edwardsharpeandthemagneticzeros.com/

 

_____________________

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

 

Helen and Dan on Relevant Radio

As a follow up to the article "

Couple begins every day with wedding vows"

published in the August 6th Catholic Herald  we were asked to do an interview with  Sean Herriot of Relevant Radio.

 

The interview was great fun and we had a chance to share a little bit of how we have kept our love alive for these past twenty years.

 

An archive of the interview can be found about 45 minutes into hour three of the 9/3 program:

http://www.relevantradio.com/Page.aspx?pid=1380&cid=17&ceid=3392&cerid=0&cdt=9%2f2%2f2009

 

The Catholic Herald article can be found at:

http://www.chnonline.org/

 

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

Grace in the dangerous part of town

I took the bus down to meet my  Big Brothers/Big sisters "Little" this morning.  It was a nightmare.  The connections were lousy and it just took forever to get there and back.  The more I think of it though, the more I realize the trip was the high point of the day. 

 

I met Dennis on 27th and Wisconsin Ave.  Dennis introduced himself to me and I immediately assumed he was a pan-handler and wanted my money.  it turned out Dennis is a sweet gentleman who is known by many people in the area.  I listened to an older woman (who knew Dennis) talking on the bus about places she's worked and volunteered.  I don't get the feeling she's been invited to any fancy events lately yet she is the type of person I admire for their giving spirit.

 

It turned out the bus driver didn't hear me when I told her where I wanted to get off the bus.  I ended up going beyond my stop and having to catch a bus back south to meet my Little.  As I was getting ready to cross the road I heard a gentleman say "Cousin, help this man across the street.".  A woman took my arm and helped me across.  I could have crossed myself but thought it better not to refuse such a kind heart.  When we got across she told me we were in front of the barber shop.  She gave me the name of the owner and told me I should let him know if I needed anything.  I didn't but it was lovely to think I could go in to a place I've never been before and know I was recommended to the owner by one of the members of the community.

 

All of these very nice encounters took place in an area of town many people are afraid to go to because of the imminent danger lurking at every street corner.  I'm grateful for the bad luck that brought me face-to-face with these people.  I can only hope they would be treated as graciously in my neighborhood.

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

The Pirate Paradox

The President has made a commitment to keeping American shipping crews safe from pirates wherever they travel in the world.  This seems a reasonable response to the recent hostage situation off the shores of Somalia.  The commitment is also a contradiction to Obama's commitment to supporting American job growth through environmentally responsible policies.

 

A major problem with using U.S. forces to protect American shipping crews as they travel in dangerous waters is the cost of the goods being protected is dramatically increased but not reported.  The cost of U.S. Navy patrols gets lost in the massive Defense Department budget and simply becomes a part of the cost of running the U.S. government.  The cost of the goods being shipped then becomes a combination of the materials, transport and marketing plus and unknown (and un reported) cost of protection.  When we, the consumer, buy these goods we pay for only part of the cost of the goods.  The other cost for these goods is paid by general tax revenues and deficit spending. 

 

An alternative to providing U.S. navy protection to private shipping interests is to let the shippers decide how they want to protect their crews and the goods they transport.  They can employ private security or pay the ransoms associated with operating in an area controlled my pirates.  In either case the costs are passed along to the buying public through higher product prices.  These higher prices reflect the true cost of the products. 

 

When faced with the true costs of products on store shelves consumers might find themselves making different decisions.  They may find themselves seeking out products produced in safer parts of the world.  Local producers may find they are able to compete with products shipped from the other side of the world once the true costs of the products are reflected in their price.

 

U.S. naval protection of private shippers provides a subsidy to the  shipping companies and to the companies bringing materials from across the world.  At a time when we need more jobs in America and have huge budget deficits we would be better served by letting shipping companies take responsibility for their own security costs.  The free market would reward companies that didn't have the cost of dealing with pirates built into their cost structure.

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

The flow at the coffee shop

I stopped at the coffee shop at the Central Library to have lunch between appointments today.  I hadn't been to the shop since they remodeled it about a year ago.  I like to give the place some business since it is run as a project for a nonprofit organization. 

 

I was surprised to find they either didn't have sandwiches any more or they only had some in the refrigerator case.  I wasn't sure which because the person behind the counter didn't make it too clear.  I figure if the shop is a project one of the lessons to learn is clear communication leads to more sales than mumbling.  I ended up having a cup of coffee and reading for a while.  As I was sitting there I heard people ordering soup.  I thought it odd the person didn't mention the soup as an option. 

 

After sitting a while I decided I'd have the soup.  I ended up waiting to order because one of the regulars was chatting with the counter person.  The soup was week and expensive. 

 

The shop is more of a fixture than a business.  The rhythm of the shop includes regulars who know the menu and occasional stragglers.  It fulfilled its mission of being a nonprofit project.  As a producer of good, fast, food it was marginal.  next time I'll stick to the coffee and find another place for lunch.

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

Today's reading - John 8:1-11

The bible reading today was the Gospel of John chapter 8 verses 1 through 11.  It's the story of the Pharisees bringing a woman who had been accused of committing adultery to Jesus.  I find the passage very interesting because of its simplicity and complexity.

 

The accepted take-away from the reading is:  let he who is without sin cast the first stone.  A great message but it doesn't do the reading justice if that is all that is seen in it.  If we took the accepted message     literally we'd never have a firm stance on anything.  The inference to not get too self-righteous is clear and worth taking to heart.  But what was Jesus writing on the ground?  The reading provides no answer.  A blog entry?  Probably not. 

 

My wife has studied the Bible and often gives me the contextual background of Bible passages.  Sometimes she is very helpful.  Sometimes I just like to sit with the reading and be satisfied with the ambiguity of the message.

 

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

The challenge of a clean slate

It is the start of a new day at the start of a new week.  There is a fresh snow to make everything appear bright and clean.

 

As I look out on the freshness of it all the opportunities are overwhelming.  Of all the things I could do with all of this freshness...  Where should I start?  How do I prioritize?  My mind races from the moment to the day to the week and beyond.  Read a book?  Shovel the snow?  Plan my week? 

 

As I fixate on the options and possibilities I realize I want to pace myself and be thoughtful in my actions:  some good music, a cup of coffee, a conversation with my daughter.  Al good and important things.  Am I pacing myself or just getting distracted?

 

A bit less analysis and a bit more savoring the time I have will put things into perspective.

 

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>

 

Not watering the wok

I made fried rice for supper last night.  After the meal I cleaned the wok I had used with salt and a paper towel.  

 

I had “rescued” this wok about thirty years ago from a closet.  My Dad’s girlfriend thought the only way to clean any cooking tools was with soap and water.  She had let the steel wok deteriorate into a rusted mess.  As I recall I found a couple of very nice cast iron frying pans at the same time.

 

After many hours of working the wok with steel wool I was able to clear the rust and have a smooth cooking surface.  I seasoned the wok with oil and have never used soap on it.  A few years ago I decided to take things one step further and stop using water on the wok.    

 

As I cleaned the wok I wondered if it was worth the effort to keep it clean. As I rubbed the salt into the wok I realized there was more to this process than just getting organic material off a cooking surface.  In asking myself if it was worth the effort I was asking myself if the meal was good enough to justify the work it took to clean up after consuming it.  It was.   I was also aware that by using the wok I had made it better than it was before I started.  I was also aware the time I spend doing simple tasks well is rarely wasted time.

 

<http://www.DanLococo.com/>-------------------------

Dan Lococo

Facilitation, planning, analysis

 

Affinity By Design, LLC

414.333.5846

dlococo@AffinityByDesign.com

<http://www.AffinityByDesign.com/>

 

Sharing hard lessons

The other day Jessica let her mother know she had sold her I-Pod for $200.  She was very proud of herself for getting some good money for something she had never used.

 

When she came home from college last night we found she was depressed about the way her semester has been going so far.  School is much harder this semester.  The math class she is taking is being taught by a new instructor who doesn’t seem to have the knowledge transfer thing down too well.  Jess needs a tutor but has been too busy to get one.  The drama of dormitory life is present at her school just as in all other schools at all other times.  Still, it is a force to be dealt with at the most inconvenient times.  And the I-Pod sale:  E-Bay let her know the buyer was fraudulent and she wasn’t likely to get paid for her I-Pod.  Unfortunately she had already sent the device to the buyer on the assumption she was dealing with an honest person.

 

I could tell how bad Jessica felt about getting ripped off.  It didn’t seem like time well spent to ask her about why she didn’t use any of the safeguards E-Bay has suggested avoiding rip-offs.  The situation left me with a dull ache in my stomach.  

 

After sleeping on it I began to wonder about that dull ache in my stomach.  It certainly had something to do with Jess getting ripped off but I don’t wish we had raised her to be suspicious of everyone she deals with.  The naivety  Jessica possesses is a precious part of her personality.  As I lay in bed thinking about how bad jess must feel about losing the $200 she thought she had earned for herself I reflected back to my college years.  I had had a beautiful racing motorcycle I no longer used but didn’t want to let go of.  I had left it in the storage area of a house I had lived at.  When I went back to get the motorcycle (many months after moving out of the house) I found it was gone and the owner knew nothing about where it might be.  It was an expensive lesson for a nieve kid.

 

I think I need to find an opportunity to share the experience with Jessica and let her figure out the lesson part for herself.  I am confident she will take the lesson well and move on with life.

 

<DanLococo.com>

 

A Ministry in Waiting

It’s the warmest morning we’ve had in the past month and a half.  Both Zoe and I really could use an early morning walk.  As I come down the driveway one of my neighbors lets me know it’s very icy.  I knew this as soon as I came out of the house, but was grateful to have the cautionary warning.

 

I’ve decided this morning to forego the standard listening fare of business reports/books in favor of commercial radio.  I figure this will allow my mind to wander during the endless stream of commercials for things I don’t need or want.  The classic rock station is playing some good music, so I think I’ve struck a good balance between time to ponder and time to just let the morning drift by.

 

My neighbor is right, it’s quite icy in places, but the warn air makes the occasional dance steps a welcome trade-off.  The walk is a good opportunity to reflect on the week.  

 

The song “Dust in the Wind” by Kansas comes on the radio.  It was popular at a time when I was quite troubled over losing my vision to retinitis pigmentosa (tunnel vision).  Listening to the song reminds me of how fleeting things can be:  having vision and loosing it, feeling sorry for myself and moving on with my life.

 

As I walk my mind goes to conversations I’ve had in the last two days.  I’ve been working on a project to get blind people more involved in the pursuit of their own independence.  In doing the grass-roots portion of this project I’ve talked to a wide variety of people and received a wide variety of responses.  Two of these people have contacted me in the past two days just to talk.

 

On Friday I got a call from a microbiologist who has lost his vision over the past three years.  This PhD has published two dozen articles and written a number of chapters for various textbooks.  He seemed very interested in the fact I have my own consulting practice, http://www.AffinityByDesign.com/.  Our discussion included some of the struggles involved in dealing with vision loss.  It was an interesting discussion; as much as I have great respect for the accomplishments this man has achieved, he seems to be equally captivated by the fact I don’t let my blindness get in the way of my goals.  There seems to be a great opportunity for mutual benefit here.  

 

On Thursday I got a call from an older woman who wanted some advice on software which would allow her computer to both magnify the screen and talk out loud.  From our previous discussions I’ve learned she has done some investing.  I am hoping to get her involved in the program I’m developing so she can be a role model for others.  As we talked I learned she really wants to do more things for herself.  She wants to be able to read her own investment reports and to be able to stay in contact with people by email.  This is exactly what I am hoping the program work I’m doing will cultivate.

 

Reflecting on these conversations brought me back to the start of my walk:  sometimes all we need is a friendly voice to remind us to watch out for the slippery spots.  I only hope I can be that friendly voice for those who reach out to me.  What if the project I’m working on could create a place where hopes and fears, and sharing of gifts came together?

 

http://www.danlococo.com/